My day at work was filled with tiny frustrations that piled on top of each other and got out of control. I tried hard all day long to put the little things in perspective and I was grateful for the conviction of the Holy Spirit as I have prayed diligently to be joyful in my job and perform it to the best of my abilities. It was one of those days where I could have easily been defeated, but felt carried by Him all day--what a blessing (not that I handled all of it perfectly or even well... there was definitely a conversation with a co-worker where I told her I just wanted to quit).
And then I got home and my phone started going with phone calls, alerts, and messages.
First news about a sweet baby I have prayed for since before she was born. Life-altering news. New that has absolutely devastated her family. And yet as I spoke to her Grandmother yesterday evening she was quick to remember God's faithfulness to walk them through the journey they have already been on and the journey they will continue to walk with Him.
Then news from a good friend and co-worker whose father is battling cancer. News that after a relapse and months of treatment, his tumor is deeper than originally thought and they are not sure it is wise to operate. News that I've walked through before in my own life in a similar way. And I am just broken for her and her family.
So as I was awakened at midnight for no apparent reason, I was grateful for the reminder of my God who is ever drawing me closer to Him. Who calls for our burdens and accepts and listens to every single plea I make. And I know that I was woken up this morning for a purpose. To spend this time with Him... sitting at His feet... reminded of His goodness, His grace, and His mercy even in the midst of disheartening news. Reminded of His sovereignty in the situations that seem absolutely out of control. And reminded of the fact that as I felt so helpless having these conversations last night, the greatest help I can be and thing I can do is to bring these sweet friends before my Jesus who is able to do all things, who brings healing and peace when doctors, friends, and others cannot. Knowing He will carry me through tomorrow no matter how little sleep I get, because spending this time in His presence will bring more rest than a good night's sleep.